Fearless Bon Jovi end-of-tour predictions

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What a difference a year makes right?

Last year at this time Richie Sambora had delivered a gutsy new solo CD Aftermath Of The Lowdown, Bon Jovi though on hiatus, was still re-grouping for one-off gigs in Canada and other places; and then fans went berserk when the band announced they had a new record and a new tour lined up for the beginning of 2013.

Now seven months after Sambora flew the coop for ‘this leg of the tour’, Bon Jovi’s mega-million tour juggernaut rolls into the land of the Mohegan Sun this weekend and begins the slow slog to Endus Of Tourus 2013.

fear2By the time the Because We Can tour limps into the final show in Brisbane, Australia on December 17, the only certainty about Bon Jovi the band is that this will be yet another huge money-making tour for Jon and his band of gypsies in pursuit of that pot of gold.

As recently as July this Bon Jovi tour had grossed $142 million with the band once again rocking more than a million faces. 

By tour’s end the gross will likely be just shy of $300 million.  With touring generating more revenue than Bon Jovi’s record sales, it’s not hard to figure out why the band spends so much time out on the road.

Which brings us to the ‘what about now?’ 800-lb gorilla in the room once this tour ends.

To put it mildly: put a fork in em’, they’re done.

Fans have been spoiled by three new records and three world tours over the past four years only this one ends on a distinctly sour note despite all the kingly spoils due to the uncertainty of the band’s future with or without Richie Sambora.

Which brings us to my fearless predictions about what fans can expect once the house lights go down  and Jon, David, Tico, Hugh, Bobby and Phil X start to croon ‘I’ll Be Home For Christmas’.

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Bon Jovi the band:  regardless of whether or not Jon Bon Jovi and songwriting partner and musical foil Richie Sambora kiss and make up sooner rather than later, you won’t see the original line-up of this band out on the road again before 2015. 

At any age the road takes a toll on the most disciplined of performers, and these guys have been at it way too long to be doing it happily on a short-turnaround like this past one.

In all likelihood, you won’t see a new studio record from Bon Jovi before 2015 either, though Lord knows the band has enough recorded material for special CD and DVD releases to last them through the next three Christmas shopping cycles.

Jon Bon Jovi: look for the CEO to return home and immerse himself in family life for about six weeks. 

Several of those will dutifully be in St Barts or some other exotic place where he can unwind and reconnect with the human race; but after that look for Dorothea to kick his OCD behind back out on the road in any capacity that gives her peace and control at home.

Look for lots of appearances at charity fundraisers, high profile work continuing with the Jon Bon Jovi Soul Foundation and the Soul Kitchen; and don’t be surprised if Jon Bon doesn’t parlay some of the millions he has earned into an ownership position in a struggling NFL franchise.

fear4As for music, Jon Bon Jovi will undoubtedly end up in the studio on his own and tour behind a solo effort in much the same way as Bruce Springsteen did with ‘The Ghost of Tom Joad’ or ‘Devils And Dust’. 

In other words, solo and stripped down.

Another possibility is any of the judging seats on X-Factor, The Voice, or American Idol…if Sambora doesn’t beat him to it first.

Richie Sambora:  let’s face it, you don’t bail on a $300 million tour proposition and get welcomed back with open arms easily, which is why I don’t see things between the Tall Slim Duke and His Royal Highness getting fixed without some serious time apart.

For his part, Mr. Bluesman has been putting ample time in with fashion design partner Nikki Lund traveling the world in support of their NikkiRich clothing line, but when Sambora tires of the locks and the frocks he’s going to want to take some serious down time of his own. 

fear6Look for him to come out with another solo record before there will be a new Bon Jovi CD of new material in any incarnation and don’t be surprised to see him permanently hook up as leader of a house band like he did with Craig Ferguson in late 2012.

Tico Torres:  if anybody in Bon Jovi has a right to be more tired than their leontine ringleader, it’s Torres, who’s arms and legs drive this bands beat on every song at every show in every city and town. 

fear7The life of rock drummer on the road with a band is second only to that of the bearded lady at the circus, and Torres, who loves to lose himself in endless rounds of golf, isn’t going to re-up for another worldwide jaunt any time soon either.

He’s also a fashionista in his own right with his Rockstar Baby clothing line; and lest anyone forget Tico is one helluva artist to boot.

rockstar-baby-la-collezione-da-bambini-creata-da-tico-torres_61558_bigDavid Bryan:  if anyone’s loyalty and consistency in Bon Jovi has been surprising, it’s been Bryan’s ability to sublimate his enormous talent and ego for his work on broadway shows like Memphis to a behemoth band that needs to tour endlessly to generate millions of dollars.

Undoubtedly this ivory-tickler is just dying to get off the road and into a quiet room somewhere where he can score more music of his own for shows written or not yet begun.  After his Tony for Memphis during the last tour I was shocked that he went out on this one.

fear8Hugh McDonald:  I include the longtime unnamed honorary member of Bon Jovi here because the fact is he has been around in some form or fashion since the very beginning.

As quiet and unassuming in his own life as he is playing a ghostly bass for Bon Jovi, McDonald is the quintessential session musician and a monumental talent in his own right.

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Matthew Bongiovi:  if anyone is going to have a lot of time on his hands it’s Brother Matt. 

Oh sure he will have plenty to do making sure all the JBJ Backstage memberships get renewed every year (just in case Bon Jovi does reunite and go back out on the road again). 

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Perhaps Matt of All Trades will be able to scare up a Runaway Tour Package in conjunction with the Bongiovi Brand pasta sauces, where for $1500 fans can come watch him crush grapes for the wine with his tootsies and then sit down and enjoy a spaghetti dinner with he and brother Tony.

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Anyway you slice it, fans have been blessed with All Jovi All The Time for a lot of years.  None of this is mean-spirited; just reality.  If you have tickets to any of the remaining shows, breathe them in deeply because Bon Jovi after this tour comes to a close will be rarified air indeed.

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 Be sure to find and follow Glenn Osrin on Facebook and on Twitter @wizardofosrin

 

One Response to “Fearless Bon Jovi end-of-tour predictions”

  1. still don’t know if I want to go without Richie ,but well said.

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